Thursday, March 14, 2013

No, this isn't God's idea or doing...

Something is bugging me. Hell, lots of things are bugging me, but this just...... Unsettles me. And it's not even my problem. But it's eating me up.

I'm friends with an older lady. She's 40. Good xtian and a lawyer. 4 kids. Hubby is also a lawyer and pastor. 
Recently I learnt from a friend we had in common that her hubby abuses her. This isn't slapping you around kind of abuse. I'm talking about "hit me so hard it looks like I fought with a thug" kind of hitting. They've been married for 15 yrs and its been like that for a while. Don't know precisely when it started. 
Grade 2 of the abuse is that she has no access to her salary account. Yes u read it right. He holds onto her ATM and checks the balance regularly to see if she's spent out of it. He decides what they use her salary for! At age 40. 
He once threatened her that he'll kill her and nothing will happen. He actually asked her if she herd about the Skye bank lady that her husband killed her. 
Oh did I mention he's a pastor? Yes he is. He checks her up ALL the time at work. I just felt he was always in the area as he's also a lawyer. But he just checks to know who she talks to and where she goes.

I'm not sure I really blame the man. I detest him but don't blame him. I wonder why in the world she condones it! She never fights back. She can't report him to anyone cos that won't be respectful to him. And hear this, she's trying to be the wife that God instructs every woman to be. I didn't see anything that looks or sounds like allow ur husband to kill u in the famous Proverbs 31. 

Unfortunately I can't talk to her directly cos she didn't tell me, she told the friend we have in common all these. She just told me out of frustration. I wish I didn't hear any of it cos every time I see her my her goes out to her and I want to slap her at the same time. 
Today he hit her. He said asides her salary she brings nothing to the table.
After sweeping the whole house one day, he packed back the diets, littered the house and locked she and the children up. Her offence is that she didn't suggest that they buy his father a birthday gift. 
I'm convinced he's not mentally balanced.

I'm more pissed at the fact that she sees no solution to all these. That she covers his bull shit up. She'd rather pretend he's a good man. Cos she believes this is what God means by being submissive.
Somehow I just fail to see God as this person she describes. 

There's help. At least thats my belief. 
Its going to be tough but she can seek help secretly and run away with her children one day. Hell, expose him in the church. He shouldnt pastor anyone! But I found out women like this never seek help. They either stay there forever 
or snap one day and do something totally crazy and go to jail. 

I'm just sad sad sad. 

Her friend keeps saying no way out. Is that true? Pls do u have a solution to this?