As usual, I couldn't find the appropriate title for this post. So much has happened and there just doesn't seem to be a phrase to capture it all. So a few updates: After what seemed like 3 long months for me, I got pregnant. Very exciting as I was waiting to see which of the gruesome and wonderful tales of pregnant women I'd tell. First trimester I started spotting and was placed on bed rest for over a month. Read so much about it and what might happen. After the bed rest all seemed fine until I started bleeding in my 2nd trim. Placed on bed rest again and after about a month I was back on my feet again. Asides those issues, I was one of those lucky women, I had just 4 or so episodes of nausea, I didn't have crazy cravings for strange stuff. Hubby was lucky. No waking him up in the night to go look for water melon or roasted corn like I hear some people do. Sometimes I hate food but won't throw up. I was sleeping like an idiot tho! I sleep for about 45 mins or so at work. I mean, in the face of deadlines et al, I simply close the books and sleep and even snore! It was embarrassing, lol. Then I didn't really blow up like I thought I would. People didn't notice my bump until I was 6 months gone except of course for people close to me. Pregnancy made me look really good. Great skin and hair. I enjoyed it. At least that period.....
Trouble started in my 7th month.
I had the usual oedema that comes with pregnancy. My feet were really swollen and painful. So on good friday, I went to the hospital just to see that all was well. After my BP reading and urine test, I found I had pre eclampsia.
I had read almost everything about pregnancy including the PIH (pregnancy induced hypertension) I had.
So when the doctor diagnosed it, I knew exactly what it meant. I was admitted immediately.
All I could think of was buying time for my baby.
For a while, all seemed well, or so I thought. I felt I was going to buy plenty time for my baby.
On my birthday during my breakfast, doctors said the baby had to be delivered that day as my BP shot so high and going further would be risking both lives. My baby was really small due to the illness. Wasn't up to 1 kg yet. Everyone cried except Bubbly. Somehow, the guy was just so strong.
Now I know what "going through the valley of the shadow of death" means. I was scared shitless!
I couldn't pray or cry anymore. I didn't know what to expect. Later I found the courage to hum one of my fave hymns:. "I will not forget thee or leave thee". It helped.
The operation didn't take so long. I was even gisting with the doctors as it was epidural. Shortly, my baby boy was delivered and he cried! My little man cried!
First time I saw him, that was a day after the operation, my heart leapt and sank almost immediately. He was so very tiny! With tubes and wires sticking all over him. He also had a bandage over his face. He had jaundice and malaria. He weighed 800 grams. Very discouraging. As with all new borns he lost weight again and dropped to 600 grams. So when I say tiny, he really was tiny.
My faith was challenged. Some moments I'd feel encouraged by the plenty stories people told me about prem babies. Next moment I'd just start crying cos I know the stakes: there were no guaranties.