Monday, October 13, 2008

E gba mi fa!

The thing wey single girl eye go see, no be small thing o!

I recently met this "Uncle" who works next to my office. Someone franctically called me like it was a life or death matter and i looked up to see this short elderly man, so out of respect, didnt know what he was going to say, i went to meet him, na im tory start o!

He started telling me of how he has been seeing me for a long time and he had really liked me and been praying one day he meets me formally. Where im dey see me? For Mama calabar spot (a canopy covered spot where office folks eat just behind my office). he said he always sees me and my colleague come eat there often. why im no come meet me since that time? He didnt want to be rude etc, etc (he no even say make e try pay for my meal once, shio!)

Why wont he like me, afterall, i get big front and back, u had to see his eyes roming and roving thru his glasses, oniranu!

So he introduced himself, took my number (i still dont know why i did that) and na im we begin love;

This Uncle makes me laff ehn! He said he spent all of his life in lagos and so he considers himself to still be one Omo Boy, young boy. He plays all the latest music in town and uses slangs so i can know that He calls me baby.

Now theres a difference btw Baby and Baby. For those of us who had a bit of razz with butter while growing up, u will remember how they call dolls "baby". Thats exactly how he calls me o!

The Uncle is short and probably thinks of himself as one very correct bobo, the man can pose!

Ntywayz, he has been calling me o, offering to drop me everywhere, i should feel free to call him so we can hang out etc, etc.

Abeg, where i for follow am go biko?

Only recently, he came up with the idea of him being in love and that he is afraid that i will break his heart one day etc, etc. love ke?! see this big mumu o!

When girl sit down jeje that she no dey do married men, see the kind issues wey dey confront them. theres even nothing to milk dry in this short Uncle o!

I have plans for him sha, by the time i carry 3 of my friends follow am go Biobak and we take half of his life savings chop fresh fish and snail, and go to Ceddi plaza to buy make up and watch moveis, he will automatically delete my number, agbaya oshi!

i will still leave him around for a week, he dash me 5k last friday, no be bad thing now, abi?

which brings me to ask: Why on earth do married men cheat?! (Jamb question abi?) The things these agbayas are ready to do for small small girls, their wives will have to practically seek the face of God, fast and then prepare their best dish just to ask for whatever! While these same men are mere toys to some other girls, u flash them and they are ready to come from Gwagwalada to Wuse! O ga o!

I know this is a popular topic and we it in the office recently and my colleague said she doesnt wanna know if her husband cheats, as long as she doesnt know about it and he hasnt stopped doing his responsibilities, she doesnt mind. this is what most women think, what u dont know wont hurt u etc, etc.

i havent been able to accept this fact o, its just so unnacceptable! what do y'all think?

Onto Private Matters:

Mr. Nice.


Back again with full force!

I think am done with anyone trying to make me feel guilty. Nice is such a wonderful and nice and caring and all those things guy. I just happen not to like him, ok, thats not totally true, i can barely stand the guy (see older post on Jacob and Esau).

recently i started feeling weird like: am i doing the right thing? should i just manage? he is a good guy ready to be everything for me etc but i dont have to try to like someone am dating, like should be the first thing!

He still came over last nite, we went over the WHOLE saga again (he just called now, he is coming to see me, again!).

happily, i discovered something last nite, i have always known he is much older than me but yesterday, i discovered that he is SO older than me, in fact, not within my age bracket AT ALL! so i can gladly turn him down even in my mind and not feel guilty about it. abi now?


Standtall said...

My man shd not just cheat period. I cant accept this "what u dont know wont hurt u o" cos e dey hurt and u go no!

U r playing wiv fire wiv that Agbaya man o. Drop him now not next week.

LusciousRon said...

All these man problem hmmn.
I was going to suggest we deal with agbaya correct thinking.
Call me when the show is going down.
Enjoy Mr. cute o

Omotee! said...

hmm, true talk sis, true talk
but fire?! Agbaya? naaaaaahhh!
nice of u to drop by, toinx!

make i call u for biobak runs abi? barawo!
girl, update fast fast o!

LG said...

babes na true mommy garfied talk o'
drop d papilo sharp sharp

BTW: shokolate lurver ' dis ya template color dey do my eyes one kind one kind o :-)

simeone said...

omotee fun ra e..this ur short guy story is really funny...gwags to can be foolish...
unto mr nice..i dont think theres anything like managing a partner o..

bumight said...

i thot of baby as in "doll" and I just started cracking up afresh!

i just think married guys hitting on me is just plain nasty! ewwwwww!!

ok not so nasty if its brad pitt, he's technically not married abi?

rayo said...

the baby thing, kai as d pronounciation settle in my head i just begin laff, jeez that is so irritating nd u still talk to this man. agbaya buruku ni bobo yi. omotee baby, dont let his wifey come nd scratch ur eyes out, d woman no go kno all these one wey u dey talk 4 here oh.

Omotee! said...

eh yah, i can see how much u love me (seriously blushing), u dont want one rabid woman come beat me but no worry, i don dismiss shortie, like bad habit, e no gree call me again cos i no call am for weekend.
how is my chocolate doing u? ehn?

my brother, una see me so? hmm, oga nice wan give me car by force by force fa! "no stringz attached".

girl, u bad o! technicality! lol. cheating is really ew ew, glad u caught the "baby" thingi.

babe mi, yes o, awon men yen sha! even today i don hook house of rep boyfriend o (gbeborun, i can see ur eyes), details later sha.
i was 2nd on ur post!!!! ope o!

rayo said...

can u see the dollar signs flashing in my eyes. lol.

Omotee! said...

@ rayo:
ahhhhhhhhhh, babe yi sha!

Anonymous said...

eeh oremi na fire be that awufu dey run belle o. so i beg orora o.

Miss Definitely Maybe said...

I do not condone cheating
I think if someone cheats
they do not love you nor respect you period!!.
I wouldnt turn a blind eye to cheating, one should definitly do something about it, it might not be leaving the relationship but could be talking it through, seeing a mariage counsellor etc. turning a blind eye is a no no , no wonder Aids is rampant in Africa

Anonymous said...

ah serious jamb question...I dunno oo...I no jus per Nice guy...this is aprodite all over again mehn....

Omotee! said...

@MDM: we so agree on this, i have never been able to find an excuse for anyone cheating, its just so wrong. annoyingly, when u say this, other people just feel u r from planet Mars or something, its just not fair!

@chari: my dear,hmm, if i manage to like Oga Nice, and manage to date him, who will help me manage to do the other things that come with the relationship which i wont be able to do? bad deal jo.

ore mi, cool down, breath well, no worry, i have discarded Shortie, there is even nothing to chop sef, lol, just kidding. but we jam for our chop center dis morning and he paid for my beans and dodo!!!!

nikO said...

now i gotta see you not call you! interesting really, but blame shorty not, he's just trying get his fingers burnt thats all, u been up to a lot lately my dear.....

Femi B said...

Married men...don't let it come bite you back in the ass oh. I pity his wife.....

OluwaDee said...

It is totally wrong to accept that ones husband will cheat.

Abeg don't mill d man dry o, remember he has a wife and children too.

LG said...

o gal' how farrrrrr? u nor go update' abi u done follow 'papalolo' go??? :-)

Omotee! said...

hmm, my guy, u still never call me o! ntwayz, my fone is lost again! will send a mail thru fb.

hey Miss Femi B! thanx for dropping by! oh, dont bother with him, he is stalest gist, dumped his ass. i wan get better marriage o, what u sow.........

abi o, make person no come milk my husband dry, pray SERIOUSLY that i dont marry a man that will think of cheating but these days, dunno, except he is a pastor or somfin.....

babe mi owon! i go update o! make u remember to pray every morning say the person wey carry my fone and wallet, make GOd deal with am. if u see the kind fone wey i dey use jeje, nobody go buy am, if i dash my village cousin sef, e no go take am, see my life... ntwayz, details later. and i missed u, internet bad again o!

Buttercup said...

Glad u'v dropped his ass! I just simply detest such men..

As for mr nice, u shud be with someone who sets ur blood on fire, someone who wudnt make u look left or he dsnt do it for u, as nice as he might be, dont settle..

rayo said...

sweetheart, where u dey?

Omotee! said...

ROTF!! thanx for the advice, mr. nice does that to me *wink wink* WHEN i do see him, i intend to get another mr. nice, details lera. thanx love!

honey, thanx so much, been travelling, busy etc etc, plus i have a new self.rule not to get on the net before 2pm so i can get some work done. thanx love.