longest time. promised myself was going to get my writing mojo back but the muse seems to be angry with me. i have like a zillion things to talk about and yet, i dont get to put anything down, i just do blog rounds and close up.
a lot has happened since my last post:
i started my leave at old office on the 15th of last month, went to lagos for the NBA conference. the conf is actually an opportunity to hook up with lots of old friends, it was fun! i had plenty fun. everyone took turns in taking me out, debonairs, chocolate royale, galleria etc. yeah, i realise how bush i sound now for not knowing all those places, I do not like Lagos! i sincerely feel u have to be superhuman or something to live in lagos. but my man Fashola has performed some miracle there, its much much saner than i expected.
the conference was nice, lots of lawyers, forming activity like we can actually care to solve Nigeria's problems. ok, i am a pessimist, and i am changing that, but i feel the issues or Nigeria cannot be solved by lots of talks and conferences, our issues are much more.......... tougher than plenty speeches. God help us.
and in Lag i saw Cutie! remember cutie?
Cutie is my name sake. Cutie and i met some 2 yrs ago and we clicked. he is so cute and so funny and brilliant plus we have plenty of chemistry. we really like each other and still both afraid to commit into a relationship cos of distance. Cutie stays in Lag, i here in Abuja with no hopes of relocating. now cutie seems to be open to the idea of the long relationship thingi and now.......... i couldnt be bothered. i really like Cutie but a real relationship takes 2 willing people. last time we discussed, we were supposed to be dating but he does something funny. when we talk on phone, he tries to be formal and nice, so that the people with him dont think he is talking to someone special. he calls later at night then gets into his element and starts the "Hi baby" thing.
whenever he introduces me to anyone, its very formal: "Meet Omotee", thats all. Its annoying! Does he think am stupid?
So, i just talked to myself. I like Cutie. would like it very much if we had something serious going on. Cutie doesnt seem to think that way. seems to me like he wants the 2 of us to know of the relationship btw us. That sucks and its really silly.
I know he had this girlfriend that they've been dating for so long and they've kinda broken up. then saw her passport in his wallet plus all his deja vu kind of attitude, i decided to confront him some 2 weeks ago about it. didnt quarell or anything. just sent him a text: "hey, are u and Miss......... still together?"
then he said "yes....but we should talk about this".
so we talked later and Cutie didnt own up, didnt say Yes we are dating or No we are not dating. just said "Babe, lets drop this, its not an issue for us. I am your man and I'm asking you to just forget about that whole issue".
can you beat that?!?!
anyway, i didnt quarell with him over it. just left the issue and dropped him as well. just stopped calling him and when he calls, i dont sound cold or anything. point is, as much as i like him, am not hung up over him, i am not crazy about him. my attitude is, if he is there, fine. if not, too bloody bad!
MF has taught me a lesson, i am not going to let anybody hurt me that much again. stay if u want to, if cant, take a hike! headache over a guy is too expensive for me to pay.
i think i have a probem. ok, maybe not a problem problem, but its there, nagging, and no, i havent gone preggers.
usually when am ovulating, i feel extremely mushy mushy, badly want to have sex, have babies, i see babies and go, awwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
for the past few days now, i have been extremely mushy mushy, my hormones are everywhere, driving me nuts. i see a nice looking tall guy and i imagine a gazillion things and the poor guy wouldnt even be looking in my direction, talkless of saying hello! i think its pathetic! i am not even ovulating. is this normal? i think its a bit abnormal.
bottom line: I need a boyfriend and i need him fast!
i promise to update something that makes sense soon, but right now, my hormones arent even helping me make sense. have a great weekend y'all!