I appreciate all the advice you guys gave in my last post. Thanks. Hopefully, this matter has been laid to rest.
I had this discussion with some of my friends, all male on the best way to break up with your girlfriend.
I was of the opinion that the particular method does not really matter, pesin wey no dey do no dey do, u no fit force am.
I've always thot waiting for a guy to develop courage or time or whatever to tell you to your face that its over is like hoping for something that may not happen.
Personally, i have not met many guys who would prefer to break up with u face to face. The ones i know are the usual cowards (no offense) who would expect you to read the signs and move on.
Out of the 3 or 4 boyfriends (sometimes i get confused as to the correct number) that i've ever had, only one seemed to be bold enough to say he needed a break for a little while to "get himself together". The other ones pretty much used the "sign language" to break up with me.
What i've tagged "Sign language" usually occurs in the following stages:
- you always call him, he hardly ever calls anymore
- he is always so busy he hardly has time to pick your calls
- when he does pick your call, he apologises and asks that you pls let him call you back which he never gets round to doing for say.... 3 days
- he avoids every kind of meeting where you'll ask him what exactly is going on
-if you are lucky to find him at home or anywhere, he will make sure the environment is not condusive for such talks or he falls ill. Either ways, no discussion takes place
I know most girls prefer that a guy breaks-up with them face to face. Usually so they can have "Closure". Why this method is prefered, i really dont understand. I am not sure I like the face to face method.
I believe you should start suspecting something is really wrong when you get to stage 2. At that point, really, the game is over and waiting for him to tell you to ur face that its over is not really paramount. But hey, thats just omotee.
So the real question is, would you rather a guy broke up with you over the phone or via text message or via e-mail or giving signs or do it face to face?
Whats the best break-up method?
Friday, September 17, 2010
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
EX Files Concluded... At least for now.......
Thanks everyone for ur contributions, they were all worth it.
So that same day, we had another lengthy argument on the whole Ex issue and again, for the upteenth time stated the reasons why i have serious issues with this particular ex.
So for a reason that i still have not been able to comprehend up till this moment, the girl called me. Yes, she did!
She called and introduced her self as "My name is Sisi" and of cos i went "Sisi who?"
"Sisi, Bubbly's friend".
"Oh, hi. How are u?"
"Am fine. And u?"
"Am fine thank u."
"So how are u and how the wedding preparations?"
What?! HEllo!!!
At that point i went totally blank, like, really, how da hell am i supposed to answer that? Whose brilliant idea was it for her to call me? Wedding preps bi ti bawo?
I told her i was in the midst of something and could she kindly call me back in 5 mins.
During that time, i calmed down so i would not react in a way i will later regret, get myself together.
So 5 mins later, she calls back and said:
"Am sorry for whatever issues i may have caused between you and Bubbly. Its just that I and Bubbly have been friends for so long and its strictly platonic. I want to assure you that I have no plans that will jeopardise your relationship in anyway. I am a woman also and wont want anyone to do that to me so i cant do it to someone else. He told me long ago that he loves you and will be with you, he always talks about you. Am sorry."
Calmly i said:
"Thanks Sisi. Kind of you but am just wondering, what brought about all these?" She said:
"Well i was chatting with Bubbly and he was asking me all these wierd questions and stuff. So i asked him to give me your phone number so i can talk to you."
"I see. Thanks then. Appreciate your call. Take care now."
"Bye".
Again i wondered, whose bright idea was this?!?!
So i had a chat with Bubbly and told him in unequivocal terms that I have no issues whatsoever with Sisi so the phone call was unnecessary, i mean, was she informing me about their friendship or seeking for an approval or what? He must have thot it was a good idea.
Anyway, the conclusion we seem to have reached now (at least both of them), conversations cut off as from that day. I sincerely dont know if they still chat or call or text and i dont think i want to be doing any 007 stunts on top this matter. i guess thats all i can do for now. Abi how i for do now?
So that same day, we had another lengthy argument on the whole Ex issue and again, for the upteenth time stated the reasons why i have serious issues with this particular ex.
So for a reason that i still have not been able to comprehend up till this moment, the girl called me. Yes, she did!
She called and introduced her self as "My name is Sisi" and of cos i went "Sisi who?"
"Sisi, Bubbly's friend".
"Oh, hi. How are u?"
"Am fine. And u?"
"Am fine thank u."
"So how are u and how the wedding preparations?"
What?! HEllo!!!
At that point i went totally blank, like, really, how da hell am i supposed to answer that? Whose brilliant idea was it for her to call me? Wedding preps bi ti bawo?
I told her i was in the midst of something and could she kindly call me back in 5 mins.
During that time, i calmed down so i would not react in a way i will later regret, get myself together.
So 5 mins later, she calls back and said:
"Am sorry for whatever issues i may have caused between you and Bubbly. Its just that I and Bubbly have been friends for so long and its strictly platonic. I want to assure you that I have no plans that will jeopardise your relationship in anyway. I am a woman also and wont want anyone to do that to me so i cant do it to someone else. He told me long ago that he loves you and will be with you, he always talks about you. Am sorry."
Calmly i said:
"Thanks Sisi. Kind of you but am just wondering, what brought about all these?" She said:
"Well i was chatting with Bubbly and he was asking me all these wierd questions and stuff. So i asked him to give me your phone number so i can talk to you."
"I see. Thanks then. Appreciate your call. Take care now."
"Bye".
Again i wondered, whose bright idea was this?!?!
So i had a chat with Bubbly and told him in unequivocal terms that I have no issues whatsoever with Sisi so the phone call was unnecessary, i mean, was she informing me about their friendship or seeking for an approval or what? He must have thot it was a good idea.
Anyway, the conclusion we seem to have reached now (at least both of them), conversations cut off as from that day. I sincerely dont know if they still chat or call or text and i dont think i want to be doing any 007 stunts on top this matter. i guess thats all i can do for now. Abi how i for do now?
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
The Ex Files (Part II)
I'll just spill it out.
When it comes to exes, i (and this is strictly my opinion) believe friendship with exes are a no no. The only situations i think it could be permissible is when both parties have moved on in every definition of that phrase:
1. u r not hung up, crying and wishing he/she would come back;
2. u r not refusing to date someone cos u keep comparing them to ur ex;
3. u r not busy plotting (either physically or mentally) evil things that u wish would happen to ur ex;
4. u r not under some delusion that you are just friends while you make sure you have everything u used to have with him while u were still a couple
You have moved on when u have faced reality and picked up pieces of your life with a strong determination to let life go on in spite of the little or big hitches it brings ur way, its called life afterall.
Sure break ups occur in different forms, some more hurtful and hard to get over than the other. Also, every individual's strength is unique, some get over things fast and some dont.
But there's always the same conclusion: you do have to move on. A deliberate refusal to accept status quo is just unrealistic and somewhat silly.
Anyway, all these is just Omotee's opinion.
I'm not sure what word to use in describing what i feel about this ex issue: anger, concern, pity, beefs .... i have no idea. i just know it pisses me off sometimes sha.
Bubbly has this Ex and their "friendship" gives me concern. First i must tell u that i trust Bubbly to a reasonable extent, i love him like crazy and i trust him. however, i dont know how to pretend that some issues dont exist.
Bubbly was dating this girl and they broke off before we started dating. They were very close friends before they started dating and it went on for about 2 years or so.
Anyway, for some reasons they broke up, they both werent operating on the same frequency anymore plus she wanted to settle abroad and he wanted to come home and settle. etc
So they broke up. He moved on (i really really wanna believe). She has found it hard to move on even after he told her he has someone else etc She keeps calling to ask for his advice on EVERYTHING. what to do with her career, what to do when her mum annoys her, whether to date some guy who's been asking her out for a while, how to go about her NYSC, what business should she go into. etc EVERYTHING! I dont know what other stuff they discuss - maybe he wont tell me cos he knows how i feel about it.
And oh, she is back in Nigeria cos she was hoping he would change his mind.
When i discovered this (by going thru his fone, not snooping tho, scold me later), i asked Bubbly and he just felt it was ok for them to still be friends, he wants to "let her down gently" kind of thing. i was like: WTH?!?!
he still has some soft spot for her (i think i should have all the soft spots!) so he finds it hard to turn her away. at some point they were talking a lot during those mid night calls. i decided not to be cool about it and just said everything i felt about it: ITS NOT HAPPENING DUDE!
Why should your ex boyfriend who has left you and has moved on with someone else be ur next best friend and confidante? he keeps saying she finds it hard to get to trust people and make friends and she isnt close to her sisters and mother etc.
Truth is i dont hate the girl and i really wish i was her friend, it would have been a lot easier for me to drum some sense into her, she needs tough love not "soft landing".
Bubbly has promised me that nothing funny is ever going to happen but this isnt safe or wise for either of them, i am the only one for him etc. but i just dont feel comfortable or is this me being paranoid?
I made my feelings known, we argued over it a coupla times and i hate it when i complain or do anything that resembles nagging. i pride myself as someone who has it together (i pull everything about me together). i told him i was going to keep off it but if i smell a rat - there'll be trouble.
He has begged me to just let him handle things (its not like i will call her or anything) and i want to trust his judgment but just yesterday, i found out that they havent had the "talk" cos he is busy trying to help her register a business name for her; meaning: they have discussed and have come to a conclusion.
My ex whom i really loved and wished things would happen btw us but has moved on with someone he is planning to wed very soon is not going to be the only lawyer or friend who can see me thru every issue i have.
Ok. Quite a rant. I need ur undiluted and uncensored view on this.
When it comes to exes, i (and this is strictly my opinion) believe friendship with exes are a no no. The only situations i think it could be permissible is when both parties have moved on in every definition of that phrase:
1. u r not hung up, crying and wishing he/she would come back;
2. u r not refusing to date someone cos u keep comparing them to ur ex;
3. u r not busy plotting (either physically or mentally) evil things that u wish would happen to ur ex;
4. u r not under some delusion that you are just friends while you make sure you have everything u used to have with him while u were still a couple
You have moved on when u have faced reality and picked up pieces of your life with a strong determination to let life go on in spite of the little or big hitches it brings ur way, its called life afterall.
Sure break ups occur in different forms, some more hurtful and hard to get over than the other. Also, every individual's strength is unique, some get over things fast and some dont.
But there's always the same conclusion: you do have to move on. A deliberate refusal to accept status quo is just unrealistic and somewhat silly.
Anyway, all these is just Omotee's opinion.
I'm not sure what word to use in describing what i feel about this ex issue: anger, concern, pity, beefs .... i have no idea. i just know it pisses me off sometimes sha.
Bubbly has this Ex and their "friendship" gives me concern. First i must tell u that i trust Bubbly to a reasonable extent, i love him like crazy and i trust him. however, i dont know how to pretend that some issues dont exist.
Bubbly was dating this girl and they broke off before we started dating. They were very close friends before they started dating and it went on for about 2 years or so.
Anyway, for some reasons they broke up, they both werent operating on the same frequency anymore plus she wanted to settle abroad and he wanted to come home and settle. etc
So they broke up. He moved on (i really really wanna believe). She has found it hard to move on even after he told her he has someone else etc She keeps calling to ask for his advice on EVERYTHING. what to do with her career, what to do when her mum annoys her, whether to date some guy who's been asking her out for a while, how to go about her NYSC, what business should she go into. etc EVERYTHING! I dont know what other stuff they discuss - maybe he wont tell me cos he knows how i feel about it.
And oh, she is back in Nigeria cos she was hoping he would change his mind.
When i discovered this (by going thru his fone, not snooping tho, scold me later), i asked Bubbly and he just felt it was ok for them to still be friends, he wants to "let her down gently" kind of thing. i was like: WTH?!?!
he still has some soft spot for her (i think i should have all the soft spots!) so he finds it hard to turn her away. at some point they were talking a lot during those mid night calls. i decided not to be cool about it and just said everything i felt about it: ITS NOT HAPPENING DUDE!
Why should your ex boyfriend who has left you and has moved on with someone else be ur next best friend and confidante? he keeps saying she finds it hard to get to trust people and make friends and she isnt close to her sisters and mother etc.
Truth is i dont hate the girl and i really wish i was her friend, it would have been a lot easier for me to drum some sense into her, she needs tough love not "soft landing".
Bubbly has promised me that nothing funny is ever going to happen but this isnt safe or wise for either of them, i am the only one for him etc. but i just dont feel comfortable or is this me being paranoid?
I made my feelings known, we argued over it a coupla times and i hate it when i complain or do anything that resembles nagging. i pride myself as someone who has it together (i pull everything about me together). i told him i was going to keep off it but if i smell a rat - there'll be trouble.
He has begged me to just let him handle things (its not like i will call her or anything) and i want to trust his judgment but just yesterday, i found out that they havent had the "talk" cos he is busy trying to help her register a business name for her; meaning: they have discussed and have come to a conclusion.
My ex whom i really loved and wished things would happen btw us but has moved on with someone he is planning to wed very soon is not going to be the only lawyer or friend who can see me thru every issue i have.
Ok. Quite a rant. I need ur undiluted and uncensored view on this.
Friday, August 27, 2010
Wedding Dress: Rent or Buy?
Am back!
Not like i really left though.
First i must thank Miss Nitty Gritty for checking up on me, really kind of you, thanks.
I've been on leave partially. Partially cos am supposed to be off work for the whole of August but i kinda resumed this week cos I abandoned some work and its time to get back to them before boss lady resumes.
I've had some fun. Went home for my friend's wedding with Bubbly, it was so much fun. you know yours truly likes to parry!
So this thing with Bubbly is actually very very serious now, intentions have been revealed, families have been involved and some serious plannings will soon be starting.
Its a lovely and extremely scary feeling at the same time! Relationships are so much fun until things get really serious and then u have lots of thinking and planning and compromising etc
Sometimes i want to bring out my pen and start planning, listing all those things i've dreamed about my wedding and building a home and after some thot i just get scared and close my book and mind.
Maybe i just have to grow up. Anyway, it will be sorted out one way or the other.
On that note, need ur opinion as usual on this:
WOuld you rent a wedding gown? I know its just ideal to get your own wedding dress but really, i think they are of sentimental value only, its virtually useless after that day so why buy and keep?
What do u think?
Lovely weekend y'all
Not like i really left though.
First i must thank Miss Nitty Gritty for checking up on me, really kind of you, thanks.
I've been on leave partially. Partially cos am supposed to be off work for the whole of August but i kinda resumed this week cos I abandoned some work and its time to get back to them before boss lady resumes.
I've had some fun. Went home for my friend's wedding with Bubbly, it was so much fun. you know yours truly likes to parry!
So this thing with Bubbly is actually very very serious now, intentions have been revealed, families have been involved and some serious plannings will soon be starting.
Its a lovely and extremely scary feeling at the same time! Relationships are so much fun until things get really serious and then u have lots of thinking and planning and compromising etc
Sometimes i want to bring out my pen and start planning, listing all those things i've dreamed about my wedding and building a home and after some thot i just get scared and close my book and mind.
Maybe i just have to grow up. Anyway, it will be sorted out one way or the other.
On that note, need ur opinion as usual on this:
WOuld you rent a wedding gown? I know its just ideal to get your own wedding dress but really, i think they are of sentimental value only, its virtually useless after that day so why buy and keep?
What do u think?
Lovely weekend y'all
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
The EX files
I sort of absconded for a while, the usual excuse of work, life etc am tired of repeating the excuses. I'm sure i have missed a lot. There was so much to write but somehow, i just could not. My muse went on strike i guess, lol.
Guess y'all been good? Chacha, thanks so much for asking after me, was so kind of you.
Lately due to some happenings and gists, there's been this thing on my mind and i'd like you all to give me your opinions on it. Its an over flogged issue i know but i still want to know what the general concensus is.
Its the case of the EX.
Is it permissible/right/ok to still be friends with an Ex?
When should your boyfriend's/girlfriend's/husband's/wife's friendship with an EX begin to bother you or when should you raise an alarm?
Where do we draw the line (if you believe friendship with an Ex is ok) or express concern when the Ex begins to feature a lot in the picture? Is it just silly jealousy or an actual issue.
long ass comments are welcome.
PS:
have a wonderful July
Guess y'all been good? Chacha, thanks so much for asking after me, was so kind of you.
Lately due to some happenings and gists, there's been this thing on my mind and i'd like you all to give me your opinions on it. Its an over flogged issue i know but i still want to know what the general concensus is.
Its the case of the EX.
Is it permissible/right/ok to still be friends with an Ex?
When should your boyfriend's/girlfriend's/husband's/wife's friendship with an EX begin to bother you or when should you raise an alarm?
Where do we draw the line (if you believe friendship with an Ex is ok) or express concern when the Ex begins to feature a lot in the picture? Is it just silly jealousy or an actual issue.
long ass comments are welcome.
PS:
have a wonderful July
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Rich Kids and School Fees
I dont have an apt title for this rant but I know what am saying.
A friend was gisting me the amount a secondary school, one of those international wannabes charge for a session for a JS1 kid. Pls guess? Anyone? N1.4 million (one million, four hundred thousand Naira) for a JS 1 child! An SS1 student just joining the school has to pay N1.6 million. Yep, u heard me. for a session!!!!
Ok, so am not a rich kid, never have been so the idea is CRAZY to me. So, does anyone agree with me that this is some kind of madness????!!!
We can say, well, thats for rich kids now. i will tell u. my friend, a fellow lawyer like me (pls be informed, practising lawyers in abuja generally earn peanuts) enrolled his 1 yr old kid for kindgergaten. pls note, all they do is teach them a few songs and make them sleep. they paid about a 100k for that child and no, thats not been outrageous, thats one of the fair prices u can get.
The secondary school thing is particularly annoying bcos its not like angels or professors teach these kids, normal people do. except u count one of those few oyinbos that circumstance bring them here to come and teach as extraordinary. i do not also think the ACs in their class rooms and cyber cafes are extraordinary factors too that warrant the charge of such exhorbitant prices.
For some parents, its not so much about their wish to get the best education for their kids, its about their own status and pride so they can say: "my kid attends such and such school, its very expensive".
i was reading the first edition of Flair, formerly TrueLove and there was this article about parents using the school their kids attend to show that they've got "Class". Those housewives dress to the teeth just to go and drop their kids and go back home o. But i digress....
Just before u go off thinking, "Omotee, u r saying this bcos u dont have that kind of money now or u r just beefing the rich". Not exactly. Of cos i pray and hope to be rich too. But its not necessarily for N1.4m school fees and thats not me not caring about my kids education.
However, am just worried about other people who will never be that rich and will never be able to afford that kind of fees.
The idea of public school is gradually dissappearing, everyone think its for the very poor people so everyone either has their own school or attends the Rich school or flies abroad. Truth is, we all wish to study above but we all shall not be able to do that. We all cannot be able to afford to pay N1.4 mill per session for our kids.
Federal Govt Colleges used to be the best schools then, but now? Nobody wants to send their kids there so the standards have dropped, they are practically abandoned. Its all about private schools now. But the truth is, not everyone can attend a private school.
I ask again, is it such a terrible idea to resuscitate public schools?
I saw a documentary on Rivers state and saw that the Governor is building a big public school, has all the good plans and ideas for the school. If the idea for the school becomes a reality, with all i heard, nobody will be under tremendous pressure to send their kids to public schools bcos all the ACs and nice structures and good teachers in the private schools are also in the public schools.
If this trend goes on without a solution, its gonna be sad.
All schools will gradually become private. Public schools will remain in the village.
It will be said cos the rich kids and poor kids will all grow up and be in the same society.
Rich kid attends great school, becomes a good child, gets good job, gets rich and buy great expensive things just to make life comfortable.
Poor kid attends bad school or no school, never finds a job at all, has no money to even eat.
Here's where they all meet:
Poor kid becomes armed robber or militant and robs or kidnaps rich kid. in an unlucky situation, poor kid kills rich kid.
The world is a complete circle; we all still meet somehow.
So, is it just me or this is an actual issue?
A friend was gisting me the amount a secondary school, one of those international wannabes charge for a session for a JS1 kid. Pls guess? Anyone? N1.4 million (one million, four hundred thousand Naira) for a JS 1 child! An SS1 student just joining the school has to pay N1.6 million. Yep, u heard me. for a session!!!!
Ok, so am not a rich kid, never have been so the idea is CRAZY to me. So, does anyone agree with me that this is some kind of madness????!!!
We can say, well, thats for rich kids now. i will tell u. my friend, a fellow lawyer like me (pls be informed, practising lawyers in abuja generally earn peanuts) enrolled his 1 yr old kid for kindgergaten. pls note, all they do is teach them a few songs and make them sleep. they paid about a 100k for that child and no, thats not been outrageous, thats one of the fair prices u can get.
The secondary school thing is particularly annoying bcos its not like angels or professors teach these kids, normal people do. except u count one of those few oyinbos that circumstance bring them here to come and teach as extraordinary. i do not also think the ACs in their class rooms and cyber cafes are extraordinary factors too that warrant the charge of such exhorbitant prices.
For some parents, its not so much about their wish to get the best education for their kids, its about their own status and pride so they can say: "my kid attends such and such school, its very expensive".
i was reading the first edition of Flair, formerly TrueLove and there was this article about parents using the school their kids attend to show that they've got "Class". Those housewives dress to the teeth just to go and drop their kids and go back home o. But i digress....
Just before u go off thinking, "Omotee, u r saying this bcos u dont have that kind of money now or u r just beefing the rich". Not exactly. Of cos i pray and hope to be rich too. But its not necessarily for N1.4m school fees and thats not me not caring about my kids education.
However, am just worried about other people who will never be that rich and will never be able to afford that kind of fees.
The idea of public school is gradually dissappearing, everyone think its for the very poor people so everyone either has their own school or attends the Rich school or flies abroad. Truth is, we all wish to study above but we all shall not be able to do that. We all cannot be able to afford to pay N1.4 mill per session for our kids.
Federal Govt Colleges used to be the best schools then, but now? Nobody wants to send their kids there so the standards have dropped, they are practically abandoned. Its all about private schools now. But the truth is, not everyone can attend a private school.
I ask again, is it such a terrible idea to resuscitate public schools?
I saw a documentary on Rivers state and saw that the Governor is building a big public school, has all the good plans and ideas for the school. If the idea for the school becomes a reality, with all i heard, nobody will be under tremendous pressure to send their kids to public schools bcos all the ACs and nice structures and good teachers in the private schools are also in the public schools.
If this trend goes on without a solution, its gonna be sad.
All schools will gradually become private. Public schools will remain in the village.
It will be said cos the rich kids and poor kids will all grow up and be in the same society.
Rich kid attends great school, becomes a good child, gets good job, gets rich and buy great expensive things just to make life comfortable.
Poor kid attends bad school or no school, never finds a job at all, has no money to even eat.
Here's where they all meet:
Poor kid becomes armed robber or militant and robs or kidnaps rich kid. in an unlucky situation, poor kid kills rich kid.
The world is a complete circle; we all still meet somehow.
So, is it just me or this is an actual issue?
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Inspirational Quotes to crack you up!
1. Dont drink and drive,
you may hit a bump and spill your drink.
this is just crazy, could not stop laughing when i saw it. u can die but not spill ur drink!
2. He calls me bitch like its a bad thing.
really, i've stopped feeling bad about anybody calling me 'ashawo', before nko? whoever wants to insult me should be innovative (and recieve an innovative bitch slapping)
3. Never under-estimate the power of foolish people in a large crowd.
right on point!
4. Ever since i stopped drinking, i have been thirsty.
mscheww, continue now....shayo master!
5. Well mannered women never made it in history.
mother theresa, joan of arc etc, they must have been kinda bad right? we just didnt know
6. Chocolate, Coffee, Men: some things are just best rich!
i loooooooove this, its on my fridge, and its so on point!
Ok, i am not as jobless as i act or look, i have simply refused to do my work at this moment, court rose some minutes ago. Oga has put us under tremendous pressure since last week so i have decided not to kill myself o jare.
I love those quotes, wish i could be very daring to put them stickers on my car when i finally have one but i know already that i cannot do it.
So whats the craziest sticker on ur car, door, anything? how daring and crazy are u?
you may hit a bump and spill your drink.
this is just crazy, could not stop laughing when i saw it. u can die but not spill ur drink!
2. He calls me bitch like its a bad thing.
really, i've stopped feeling bad about anybody calling me 'ashawo', before nko? whoever wants to insult me should be innovative (and recieve an innovative bitch slapping)
3. Never under-estimate the power of foolish people in a large crowd.
right on point!
4. Ever since i stopped drinking, i have been thirsty.
mscheww, continue now....shayo master!
5. Well mannered women never made it in history.
mother theresa, joan of arc etc, they must have been kinda bad right? we just didnt know
6. Chocolate, Coffee, Men: some things are just best rich!
i loooooooove this, its on my fridge, and its so on point!
Ok, i am not as jobless as i act or look, i have simply refused to do my work at this moment, court rose some minutes ago. Oga has put us under tremendous pressure since last week so i have decided not to kill myself o jare.
I love those quotes, wish i could be very daring to put them stickers on my car when i finally have one but i know already that i cannot do it.
So whats the craziest sticker on ur car, door, anything? how daring and crazy are u?
Monday, May 17, 2010
Where is LG?? And MDM?
Hi loves!
This aint a real post.
Where is LG (Lady Guide)?? the girl has dissappeared, like lots of people. Anyone knows her? Just concerned.
And MDM (Miss Definitely Maybe; My Mother's Child). Anyone who has news, pls lets know. Know nothing is wrong with them, just concerned.
Blog Awards:
Tried to nominate, think its the hardest thing (asides doing my actual job), there are a zillion bloggers and a million ones that deserve awards. will see.
have a great week everyone!
This aint a real post.
Where is LG (Lady Guide)?? the girl has dissappeared, like lots of people. Anyone knows her? Just concerned.
And MDM (Miss Definitely Maybe; My Mother's Child). Anyone who has news, pls lets know. Know nothing is wrong with them, just concerned.
Blog Awards:
Tried to nominate, think its the hardest thing (asides doing my actual job), there are a zillion bloggers and a million ones that deserve awards. will see.
have a great week everyone!
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Manners - do people still have it?!
I've been meaning to do a post on something else entirelyand earlier this week but trust the Boss lady, she has found a way of keeping me gainfully employed this week. Plus, typing right now aint no fun -
I am a very fast and furious typist, as in, i type so fast my keyboards smoke, ok, not exactly but u get the point, am very fast. Prof made sure i started learning it right from primary 6, paid off cos i've always been a lawyer/secretary.
So, last weekend, i went to go and fix my nails. I never do that but i saw some girl's own and it looked really nice, always wanted to do it, decided to try it (thats the 2nd time in all my life).
as expected, everyone thot it looked nice, my fingers were heavier and felt akward. i found it difficult to do my normal stuff like ..... u know.
to type - na wahala. as in, see ur sister, it was hard. Jenifa for do better pass me sef. its like a village girl wearing 6 inch high heels for the first time, omo, e no funny!
i concluded by asking myself "WHO SEND ME MESSAGE O?" so am pulling them out tomorow, abegi!
i digress. to the message of the day....
when people hear manners, ettiquettes, respect etc, what exactly goes thru their mind?
this guy added me on facebook like a zillion times, kept refusing but found we grew up in the same town and attend same church, so out of courtesy (or so i thot) i accepted. he keeps trying to chat, i always ignore. so today out of the magnanimity of my heart, i responded to his chat. hi, hello, wassup etc he went:
boy: so i guess u r married right? u look like u r married
me: oh, married people have looks now? how do they look?
boy: yes now. you are fat and u look matured.
(in my head, bells went off)
me: XCUSE ME?! did u just call me FAT?!
boy: yes now, i know what i see.
that was it. i practically went off the hook and delivered a lecture.
u dont just call people fat, its rude. least of all to a lady, least of all to someone who is not particularly your friend, u dont go about telling them they are fat. u keep ur personal opinions of them to yourself until you have the kind of relationship that allows u to say stuff like that. of cos u and i are not going to get to that point where u call me fat............. etc
he said sorry o, he didnt mean it. i just couldnt be bothered, i told him everything i had to tell him and went off. am gonna delete him.
ok, maybe what he did wasnt that much, it was just to serve as some deterence. this kind of boy goes scott free and next he's going to say my boobs look sexy, i mean, really! he's probably paying for some other peoples sins of rudeness.
thats how someone posted a pic of me at salsa on her facebook page sometime ago, and a guy i've known for long and whom we had no love lost btw us decided to comment and say -
"how omotee wey fat like this go fit dance salsa?"
my other friends on the page immediately told him how wrong it was of him to say that and how he shd wait and hear from me. i replied there and sent a strongly worded msg to him of how it was extremely rude of him to call me fat on facebook and how it wasnt his biz wax if i could dance or not no matter how fat. he damaged an already akward relationship. he apologised but hey, he entered the list of mannerless folks.
i think its important that poeople should know what to say to whom and where. u dont go slapping the butts of someone u r not dating or have a close relationship with (yep, know a guy who did that to a friend).
or a lawyer i saw in court who wanted to get friendly and after greeting me goes "so whats that your number na?" i can cite a zillion examples. some people are just rude!
its important that people should know how to talk and address people. manners is not just kneeling and prostrating for elderly people or pretending like you dont talk in their presence.
anyway, i have 4 files to work on and just heard one is to be handed in on saturday, gotta go now!
may your days be free from mannerless twarts!!
I am a very fast and furious typist, as in, i type so fast my keyboards smoke, ok, not exactly but u get the point, am very fast. Prof made sure i started learning it right from primary 6, paid off cos i've always been a lawyer/secretary.
So, last weekend, i went to go and fix my nails. I never do that but i saw some girl's own and it looked really nice, always wanted to do it, decided to try it (thats the 2nd time in all my life).
as expected, everyone thot it looked nice, my fingers were heavier and felt akward. i found it difficult to do my normal stuff like ..... u know.
to type - na wahala. as in, see ur sister, it was hard. Jenifa for do better pass me sef. its like a village girl wearing 6 inch high heels for the first time, omo, e no funny!
i concluded by asking myself "WHO SEND ME MESSAGE O?" so am pulling them out tomorow, abegi!
i digress. to the message of the day....
when people hear manners, ettiquettes, respect etc, what exactly goes thru their mind?
this guy added me on facebook like a zillion times, kept refusing but found we grew up in the same town and attend same church, so out of courtesy (or so i thot) i accepted. he keeps trying to chat, i always ignore. so today out of the magnanimity of my heart, i responded to his chat. hi, hello, wassup etc he went:
boy: so i guess u r married right? u look like u r married
me: oh, married people have looks now? how do they look?
boy: yes now. you are fat and u look matured.
(in my head, bells went off)
me: XCUSE ME?! did u just call me FAT?!
boy: yes now, i know what i see.
that was it. i practically went off the hook and delivered a lecture.
u dont just call people fat, its rude. least of all to a lady, least of all to someone who is not particularly your friend, u dont go about telling them they are fat. u keep ur personal opinions of them to yourself until you have the kind of relationship that allows u to say stuff like that. of cos u and i are not going to get to that point where u call me fat............. etc
he said sorry o, he didnt mean it. i just couldnt be bothered, i told him everything i had to tell him and went off. am gonna delete him.
ok, maybe what he did wasnt that much, it was just to serve as some deterence. this kind of boy goes scott free and next he's going to say my boobs look sexy, i mean, really! he's probably paying for some other peoples sins of rudeness.
thats how someone posted a pic of me at salsa on her facebook page sometime ago, and a guy i've known for long and whom we had no love lost btw us decided to comment and say -
"how omotee wey fat like this go fit dance salsa?"
my other friends on the page immediately told him how wrong it was of him to say that and how he shd wait and hear from me. i replied there and sent a strongly worded msg to him of how it was extremely rude of him to call me fat on facebook and how it wasnt his biz wax if i could dance or not no matter how fat. he damaged an already akward relationship. he apologised but hey, he entered the list of mannerless folks.
i think its important that poeople should know what to say to whom and where. u dont go slapping the butts of someone u r not dating or have a close relationship with (yep, know a guy who did that to a friend).
or a lawyer i saw in court who wanted to get friendly and after greeting me goes "so whats that your number na?" i can cite a zillion examples. some people are just rude!
its important that people should know how to talk and address people. manners is not just kneeling and prostrating for elderly people or pretending like you dont talk in their presence.
anyway, i have 4 files to work on and just heard one is to be handed in on saturday, gotta go now!
may your days be free from mannerless twarts!!
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Now this is the kind of thing a mother sees and shouts CHIMMM OOOO!!!!!!!
i know say na pikin but abeg, wetin d little nigger dey think?!?!?
Plus the snr nigga who took the picture, maybe na film sha and na director say make im try am, or what could be responsible for this madness ehn?!?!
Anyway, my post really isnt about the boy who was about to destroy the very essence of his being as a man, its just something i thot would crack u up a bit.
1. I love rainy saturday mornings in august, the type where the rain would just not stop and am jobless. curl up in bed with a nice novel and soft music, its my definition of tranquility.
2. I love dressing up and looking good. It may not happen always but i love the confidence that comes with you knowing u look good even b4 anyone comments on how nice u look. I love everything that comes with looking good, jewelries, nice cloths, shoes etc anything (very vain abi?)
3. I love cakes. every kind of lovely cakes. esp the ones that have chocs and fruits. a nicely done sinful choc cake gives me an orgasmic feeling. its just...... great!!!
4. I love cute bathrooms. anytime i go thru catalogues, i just dream of how nice i'd love my bathroom to be, with scented candles all over the place.
5. I love music. i have an eclectic taste. i love everything except hard rock and rap. i can tolerate some rap but never hard rock. good music lifts my soul all the time.
6. I love cooking. Yes. the idea of turning everything available into some tasty and beautiful looking meals make me very happy.
7. I so love having people around me. like hanging out with lots of friends, inviting people over and just generally having fun. i love people (like anyone doesnt) i love doing anything that will make someone happy. its fulfilling.
8. I love apples. If i there's the chance, I could eat 8 large apples in a day.
9. Now the strange and weird one: I love to pee. I love peeing after holding it for a while, i love the relief that comes with it and the way it just makes my tummy go dooooooooowwwwwwwwwwnnnn. strange eh?
10.I love blogging. doing blog rounds, dropping comments and all. It makes my ordinary life much more fun.
so far, what do we have in common?
(i didnt think people shd be categorised as things so i didnt mention pple i love. plus that would be a whole book!)
I tag everyone that loves to do a tag.
nice weekend ahead
Monday, April 26, 2010
Thank You
Hulloz!
First off i have to apologise that i have not thanked you all for the messages and calls for my birthday, the usual excuse, WORK and no internet last week!
i really really appreciated it, God bless y'all!
My birthday was low key but quite good day. its so nice when people remember ur birthday, dont mind me, i get excited about little stuff like that. so i was all smiles that day with aching cheeks to show for it, but it was pleasant having the aching cheeks.
Later in the evening, i hung out with a few friends and some of Bubbly's friends too. just had suya and drinks, gisting laughing and making sure nobody was sitting too close to my very beautiful and sexy 17 yr old cousin. the girl is fine and Bubbly's friends were trying to get close. i'll be some strict mummy abi? i think so too!
oh and the gifts, u know i love, gifts, who doesnt. i got lovely stuff from my friends. still got gifts till last saturday sef. Bubbly's folks got me gifts too, aint i just blessed.
Thanks Bubbly for making my life so beautiful, u're simply wonderful!
have a nice week everyone, may good and special things happen to you this wonderful week.
First off i have to apologise that i have not thanked you all for the messages and calls for my birthday, the usual excuse, WORK and no internet last week!
i really really appreciated it, God bless y'all!
My birthday was low key but quite good day. its so nice when people remember ur birthday, dont mind me, i get excited about little stuff like that. so i was all smiles that day with aching cheeks to show for it, but it was pleasant having the aching cheeks.
Later in the evening, i hung out with a few friends and some of Bubbly's friends too. just had suya and drinks, gisting laughing and making sure nobody was sitting too close to my very beautiful and sexy 17 yr old cousin. the girl is fine and Bubbly's friends were trying to get close. i'll be some strict mummy abi? i think so too!
oh and the gifts, u know i love, gifts, who doesnt. i got lovely stuff from my friends. still got gifts till last saturday sef. Bubbly's folks got me gifts too, aint i just blessed.
Thanks Bubbly for making my life so beautiful, u're simply wonderful!
have a nice week everyone, may good and special things happen to you this wonderful week.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
28th
I'm here to say how much I love you
(Cos you love me unconditionally)
I'm here to say how much I adore you
(You're too kind and wonderful to me)
Lord am not here to complain, about my many problems
(They are there, almost overwhelming but hey, am alive, there's hope)
By your spirit and ur Grace, am confident u'll solve them
(You live and so I can face tommorow)
I'm here to say I love you.....
I love to love you Lord
....Thank you for your unconditional love!!!
(That was me getting emotional and spiritual)
Thank you everyone for your text messages and (missed) calls. I am so grateful. I feel so loved right now.
I shall be back to give you full details. Have a great day y'all!
(Cos you love me unconditionally)
I'm here to say how much I adore you
(You're too kind and wonderful to me)
Lord am not here to complain, about my many problems
(They are there, almost overwhelming but hey, am alive, there's hope)
By your spirit and ur Grace, am confident u'll solve them
(You live and so I can face tommorow)
I'm here to say I love you.....
I love to love you Lord
....Thank you for your unconditional love!!!
(That was me getting emotional and spiritual)
Thank you everyone for your text messages and (missed) calls. I am so grateful. I feel so loved right now.
I shall be back to give you full details. Have a great day y'all!
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
My Birthday, the Number, Cramps, Clinics etc
I am as disturbed as the title, just ignore it, its the cramps.
Imagine, i've got the horrible cramps again, they just wont go away would they? its threatening to spoil my day as am grovelling, crouching and wincing in pain. this curse of being a woman! maybe i'll go get knocked up - wait, that leads to labour right?? OH HELL!!! (how apt that am listening to "No Woman No Cry)
so i go to the clinic and trust civil service, it took me several minutes to get to see the doc finally, stupid protocols that have to be adhered to even if the patient is dying. whats it with clinics and nurses anyway? they just have to give u silly attitudes, i was extremely pissed.
thankfully the doc is a kind woman and prescribed drugs and then it took the nurse/pharmacist another 15 mins to get me the frigging drugs, an elderly woman who i'd have liked but instead, she started giving me funny attitude too, i wonder if they think people just like to come and visit the clinic and see what it looks like. she was busy laughing and chatting with some other lady. right that moment, i wished i was the CR so i can yell and transfer the pains to her and then issue her a query. finally, i got my drugs and left.
then the guy i asked to bring my breakfast took another one long hour (maybe not that long sha) and i was told to eat well before i take the drugs. EVERYONE is just trying to complicate my mood!
ok, cramps mess my days up so am just having a bad day. guess the pill is kicking in now.
again i ask, must i have cramps?!
better the cramps today than tommorow cos aint nothing stopping me from eating choc cakes tommorow.
so as promised in previous post, my number is 08035837027. would love to hear from u tommorow
have a cramp and annoying-people free day y'all!
Imagine, i've got the horrible cramps again, they just wont go away would they? its threatening to spoil my day as am grovelling, crouching and wincing in pain. this curse of being a woman! maybe i'll go get knocked up - wait, that leads to labour right?? OH HELL!!! (how apt that am listening to "No Woman No Cry)
so i go to the clinic and trust civil service, it took me several minutes to get to see the doc finally, stupid protocols that have to be adhered to even if the patient is dying. whats it with clinics and nurses anyway? they just have to give u silly attitudes, i was extremely pissed.
thankfully the doc is a kind woman and prescribed drugs and then it took the nurse/pharmacist another 15 mins to get me the frigging drugs, an elderly woman who i'd have liked but instead, she started giving me funny attitude too, i wonder if they think people just like to come and visit the clinic and see what it looks like. she was busy laughing and chatting with some other lady. right that moment, i wished i was the CR so i can yell and transfer the pains to her and then issue her a query. finally, i got my drugs and left.
then the guy i asked to bring my breakfast took another one long hour (maybe not that long sha) and i was told to eat well before i take the drugs. EVERYONE is just trying to complicate my mood!
ok, cramps mess my days up so am just having a bad day. guess the pill is kicking in now.
again i ask, must i have cramps?!
better the cramps today than tommorow cos aint nothing stopping me from eating choc cakes tommorow.
so as promised in previous post, my number is 08035837027. would love to hear from u tommorow
have a cramp and annoying-people free day y'all!
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Describing the process of SEX
Never mind the title, its just some crazy stuff i heard in Dr. House Season I by that girl....cant remember her name now (yeah i just caught the house bug all these while). There's this part where she was explaining what the body goes thru during sex:
"Pupils dilate, arteries constrict.
Core temperature rises, heart races, blood pressure skyrockets, respiration becomes rapid and shallow.
The brain fires bursts of electrical impulses from nowhere to nowhere.
Secretions spit out of every gland and the muscles tense and spasm like you're lifting 3 times your body weight.
Its violent, its ugly and its messy"
WTH?!! thats some crazy description!!!!
Hope u had a great easter?
Mine was.....
Prof (thats my father) summoned us to come home for thanksgiving on Sunday. i really didnt want to go but i had no choice. it was extremely hot and i was sweating like a xmas goat! Sunday was kinda fun sha. We all (Prof, mum, my lil brother and me) had to sit in the front row and wearing "anko" (same kind of materia) which is something we NEVER do. my brother and i DO NOT as a rule sit in front of the church, or sit together or wear the same cloth for any reason. i think the last time we did the anko thing was during gran's burial. i sit in the last row with my friends and do everything but listen to the sermon, ushers always have issues with us. that was a long time tho and we've changed. so u can imagine how uncomfortable it was sitting in front and greeting EVERYBODY in church, my cheeks were sore. and afterwards i had to start answering the most popular question "When are we coming to eat rice" or "When are u bringing him" or "Do quick o, time is going o" which just annoys me. I answer them "Lets go buy a husband when u discover a mall that sells good ones". ok, not exactly, i only answer them in my mind amidst very fake smiles. its tres annoying!
we had a reception in the house after church and there were lots of folks from church. Prof invited everybody against the 150 or so people he told my mum. it made me realise one thing: i really love parties when we are not the ones hosting the guests, its more fun that way dont u think?
anyway, it was ok, i invited all my friends (trust me) and there was lots of gisting, laughing and drinks and cake (they came late so no food for them, lol). i realised in spite of the stress that it really is fun to be home again. it always is.
it would be better if telepathy can really work tho, the only aspect of traveling that i like is closing my eyes and getting to my destination without going on the road or in the air, its stressful on the road and its scary in the air. all in all it wasnt bad. i returned on monday to come see my beloved Bubbly. looking fwd to the next holiday.
my birthday is next wednesday, 14th april. i shall be 28. i don old o! i have license to eat the most sinful choc cake on that day with a large cup of ice cream, its my birthday now! like sugarking, i shall be doing something daring, i'd love to get a text msg or phone call from my blog family. i'll drop the number on wednesday.
i spoke to sugarking!!! he's absolutely cooooooooolllllllll and funny! thats the first blogger i will speak to except for those that i've known before. it was nice.
have a nice day y'all!
"Pupils dilate, arteries constrict.
Core temperature rises, heart races, blood pressure skyrockets, respiration becomes rapid and shallow.
The brain fires bursts of electrical impulses from nowhere to nowhere.
Secretions spit out of every gland and the muscles tense and spasm like you're lifting 3 times your body weight.
Its violent, its ugly and its messy"
WTH?!! thats some crazy description!!!!
Hope u had a great easter?
Mine was.....
Prof (thats my father) summoned us to come home for thanksgiving on Sunday. i really didnt want to go but i had no choice. it was extremely hot and i was sweating like a xmas goat! Sunday was kinda fun sha. We all (Prof, mum, my lil brother and me) had to sit in the front row and wearing "anko" (same kind of materia) which is something we NEVER do. my brother and i DO NOT as a rule sit in front of the church, or sit together or wear the same cloth for any reason. i think the last time we did the anko thing was during gran's burial. i sit in the last row with my friends and do everything but listen to the sermon, ushers always have issues with us. that was a long time tho and we've changed. so u can imagine how uncomfortable it was sitting in front and greeting EVERYBODY in church, my cheeks were sore. and afterwards i had to start answering the most popular question "When are we coming to eat rice" or "When are u bringing him" or "Do quick o, time is going o" which just annoys me. I answer them "Lets go buy a husband when u discover a mall that sells good ones". ok, not exactly, i only answer them in my mind amidst very fake smiles. its tres annoying!
we had a reception in the house after church and there were lots of folks from church. Prof invited everybody against the 150 or so people he told my mum. it made me realise one thing: i really love parties when we are not the ones hosting the guests, its more fun that way dont u think?
anyway, it was ok, i invited all my friends (trust me) and there was lots of gisting, laughing and drinks and cake (they came late so no food for them, lol). i realised in spite of the stress that it really is fun to be home again. it always is.
it would be better if telepathy can really work tho, the only aspect of traveling that i like is closing my eyes and getting to my destination without going on the road or in the air, its stressful on the road and its scary in the air. all in all it wasnt bad. i returned on monday to come see my beloved Bubbly. looking fwd to the next holiday.
my birthday is next wednesday, 14th april. i shall be 28. i don old o! i have license to eat the most sinful choc cake on that day with a large cup of ice cream, its my birthday now! like sugarking, i shall be doing something daring, i'd love to get a text msg or phone call from my blog family. i'll drop the number on wednesday.
i spoke to sugarking!!! he's absolutely cooooooooolllllllll and funny! thats the first blogger i will speak to except for those that i've known before. it was nice.
have a nice day y'all!
Monday, March 29, 2010
PHOTO SHOOT
halloz!!! hope u had a great weekend?
am jobless so i thot to bore u with some pictures, what do u think?
1. really, granny, what is this? maybe she has 'mad cow disease".
2.WTH????!!!!!! where im dey go?
3. umm, for real? which is she trying to keep in shape? will the gym help?
4. waoh! happy birthday?
5. big reason
6. the sign reads " da ile si ibi yi ki o s'oriburuku tabi ki o s'ofo tomotomo ninu odun yi"
7. desperate measures for desperate yahoo yahoo boy! i am trying to imagine what he is saying "oya, send the money now now!"
am jobless so i thot to bore u with some pictures, what do u think?
1. really, granny, what is this? maybe she has 'mad cow disease".
2.WTH????!!!!!! where im dey go?
3. umm, for real? which is she trying to keep in shape? will the gym help?
4. waoh! happy birthday?
5. big reason6. the sign reads " da ile si ibi yi ki o s'oriburuku tabi ki o s'ofo tomotomo ninu odun yi"
which means "dump refuse here and (literarily) have a bad head (and be cursed with bad luck) or perish together with your children this year.
guess the conventional DO NOT DUMP REFUSE HERE did not work, this sure worked!
7. desperate measures for desperate yahoo yahoo boy! i am trying to imagine what he is saying "oya, send the money now now!"have a great day people!
Friday, March 26, 2010
From Happily Married to DIVORCED
I know am not allowed to talk about my job, like our cases, but then am not their lawyer so technically, the lawyer/client priviledge isnt my biz now.
so its about a divorce case, i really do feel bad seeing divorce cases. makes me wonder why 2 people who loved themselves enough to tied the knot just throw it all away at some point, its especially bad when they are a young couple.
this lady came in heavily pregnant last december when she just filed the suit. she's got a kid for dude before, so she wants a divorce and naturally, her papers contain all the nasty things he's done to her and how he kicked her out, pregnancy et al.
dude gets a lawyer too and he also talked about how irresponsible she is, how she's got a controlling mother who is equally mannerless and a sister who leads a really wayward life.
one of his complaints is that he told the girl before they married that she had to quit her job at the bank. dude happens to be a business man who doesnt have much education. he says the mother-in-law keeps encouraging her to continue the job at the bank against his wishes and their agreement. etc. wish u could read the papers yourselves and see just how messy things can get between couples.
i wish i could call them to order and think of their 2 babies before doing this but who am i to say anything? i am a single girl, dont think i know that much about how marriage works, it still amazes me.
all these just got me thinking: if they had these much problems and serious issues, how da hell did they end up getting married and knocking themselves up to result to 2 kids?!
the girl is so pretty and young and u could see she really looks frustrated, she was crying the first time she came to court when her stupid lawyer was messing up her case and she was trying to get custody of their first kid, pending the divorce suit itself though. i couldnt help looking at her and pitying her.
i kept wondering what they were saying and doing while they were courting, didnt they resolve these obvious serious issues? if she truly agreed to quit her work at the bank why is she backing out on it? and is dude having these issues cos he is suddenly intimidated of her success and how much money she could make out of it?
when 2 people say they love each other so much and agree to mix oil and water (marry), why cant they settle whatever issues come their way? of cos there are lots of examples around us of how bad marriages can end up.
on a personal note, my parents tho not divorced dont have a good marriage, in fact, in ways that matter, they are divorced but still living together. they hardly talk and dont even care enough to fight anymore. this has been on for about ......... 20 years? sure it got worse over the years but its always been rocky. i've intervened and sort of lost hope on them, i think i just wanna ask my pop one day: if my mom dies one day, will he start crying and give speeches about how much he loved her? i think am gonna shut him up or just burst out laughing, that would be a joke.
did they love each other at all?
while i was in secondary school, i had a friend whose parents too had problems, were not divorced but theirs was equally terrible. they are separated. they came separately to visit her one day and didnt as much as say hello to each other, after 5 kids! how on earth did they get there?
i am not married so i dont know how to answer these questions. it makes me wonder when i do get married:
will we wake up one day and hate each other so much we want to get divorced?
will we have issues so bad i wouldnt care what happens to him and vice versa?
what if we have problems and am willing to sort it out and one day he just decides, no, he doesnt want to settle it, he just wants a divorce, what will i do?
do i have the ability to stay married forever?
am going to be 28 next month so naturally, everyone (including me) expects that i should be married or at least, be preparing serious towards it.
with all these things, what i have seen personally, i'm just scared of the idea of marriage when i think about the nitty gritty of it.
dont get me wrong, i do want to marry. i want to have a companion and be someone's help-meet. i want to have beautiful kids that i can train up one day. i want to have my family. the idea of me getting married appeals to me and its not just about the marriage ceremony.
but in spite of all these, i am scared of marriage. its really scary. there's not guarantee that this is how my marriage will turn out, that i will be forever happy with my husband. no certainties, just hopes and wishes and faith that it will turn out well. thats it. looks like a thin thread.
i and Bubbly had a big row on tuesday and we settled it all yesterday. it was a small issue that blew up into something else cos normally, we dont go to sleep without talking about whatever's bothering us, thats the rule. and somewhere in my mind yesterday before we settled it, i just got tired and thot i'd just quit.
i dont know why and how my mind entertained that thot cos i really love Bubbly. he actually said he thinks deep down i am scared of commitment. sure i argued that no, i dont. but maybe i do?
its all so scary. will i just easily give up on my marriage when problems come, cos i know they will come?
am i the only 28 year old female thinking this way?
these folks, are the thots in my mind this friday morning and i thot to share it with the one people who'd listen. getting pretty personal eh?
for those of u who have braved it and married (mrs. sydelle, enkay), i salute ur courage and pray that u'll never ever get divorced, no matter what.
for those of u who havent, pray u find the courage. i heard (and have also seen) that it does work out and marriage is truly a beautiful thing.
of course i'd love to hear ur thots.
have a great weekend y'all!
so its about a divorce case, i really do feel bad seeing divorce cases. makes me wonder why 2 people who loved themselves enough to tied the knot just throw it all away at some point, its especially bad when they are a young couple.
this lady came in heavily pregnant last december when she just filed the suit. she's got a kid for dude before, so she wants a divorce and naturally, her papers contain all the nasty things he's done to her and how he kicked her out, pregnancy et al.
dude gets a lawyer too and he also talked about how irresponsible she is, how she's got a controlling mother who is equally mannerless and a sister who leads a really wayward life.
one of his complaints is that he told the girl before they married that she had to quit her job at the bank. dude happens to be a business man who doesnt have much education. he says the mother-in-law keeps encouraging her to continue the job at the bank against his wishes and their agreement. etc. wish u could read the papers yourselves and see just how messy things can get between couples.
i wish i could call them to order and think of their 2 babies before doing this but who am i to say anything? i am a single girl, dont think i know that much about how marriage works, it still amazes me.
all these just got me thinking: if they had these much problems and serious issues, how da hell did they end up getting married and knocking themselves up to result to 2 kids?!
the girl is so pretty and young and u could see she really looks frustrated, she was crying the first time she came to court when her stupid lawyer was messing up her case and she was trying to get custody of their first kid, pending the divorce suit itself though. i couldnt help looking at her and pitying her.
i kept wondering what they were saying and doing while they were courting, didnt they resolve these obvious serious issues? if she truly agreed to quit her work at the bank why is she backing out on it? and is dude having these issues cos he is suddenly intimidated of her success and how much money she could make out of it?
when 2 people say they love each other so much and agree to mix oil and water (marry), why cant they settle whatever issues come their way? of cos there are lots of examples around us of how bad marriages can end up.
on a personal note, my parents tho not divorced dont have a good marriage, in fact, in ways that matter, they are divorced but still living together. they hardly talk and dont even care enough to fight anymore. this has been on for about ......... 20 years? sure it got worse over the years but its always been rocky. i've intervened and sort of lost hope on them, i think i just wanna ask my pop one day: if my mom dies one day, will he start crying and give speeches about how much he loved her? i think am gonna shut him up or just burst out laughing, that would be a joke.
did they love each other at all?
while i was in secondary school, i had a friend whose parents too had problems, were not divorced but theirs was equally terrible. they are separated. they came separately to visit her one day and didnt as much as say hello to each other, after 5 kids! how on earth did they get there?
i am not married so i dont know how to answer these questions. it makes me wonder when i do get married:
will we wake up one day and hate each other so much we want to get divorced?
will we have issues so bad i wouldnt care what happens to him and vice versa?
what if we have problems and am willing to sort it out and one day he just decides, no, he doesnt want to settle it, he just wants a divorce, what will i do?
do i have the ability to stay married forever?
am going to be 28 next month so naturally, everyone (including me) expects that i should be married or at least, be preparing serious towards it.
with all these things, what i have seen personally, i'm just scared of the idea of marriage when i think about the nitty gritty of it.
dont get me wrong, i do want to marry. i want to have a companion and be someone's help-meet. i want to have beautiful kids that i can train up one day. i want to have my family. the idea of me getting married appeals to me and its not just about the marriage ceremony.
but in spite of all these, i am scared of marriage. its really scary. there's not guarantee that this is how my marriage will turn out, that i will be forever happy with my husband. no certainties, just hopes and wishes and faith that it will turn out well. thats it. looks like a thin thread.
i and Bubbly had a big row on tuesday and we settled it all yesterday. it was a small issue that blew up into something else cos normally, we dont go to sleep without talking about whatever's bothering us, thats the rule. and somewhere in my mind yesterday before we settled it, i just got tired and thot i'd just quit.
i dont know why and how my mind entertained that thot cos i really love Bubbly. he actually said he thinks deep down i am scared of commitment. sure i argued that no, i dont. but maybe i do?
its all so scary. will i just easily give up on my marriage when problems come, cos i know they will come?
am i the only 28 year old female thinking this way?
these folks, are the thots in my mind this friday morning and i thot to share it with the one people who'd listen. getting pretty personal eh?
for those of u who have braved it and married (mrs. sydelle, enkay), i salute ur courage and pray that u'll never ever get divorced, no matter what.
for those of u who havent, pray u find the courage. i heard (and have also seen) that it does work out and marriage is truly a beautiful thing.
of course i'd love to hear ur thots.
have a great weekend y'all!
Friday, March 19, 2010
Hulloz!
I can imagine all i've missed, been doing blog rounds. the internet went AWOL on me for about 2 weeks and as usual, i've been extremely busy, sometimes i just hate lawyers..... And nothing new's happening so.....
I've been having serious menstrual cramps since yesterday, the kind that grips u and makes u bowl over with really agonizing pains. Just made me wonder how childbirth is going to be if ordinary menstrual cramps is this bad, the mere thought of childbirth makes me shudder.... na wa.
But really, i want a lasting solution to this cramps thing, it makes my life really miserable, cramps, waist pain, back ache, giant headaches and dysentry. I take 2 capsules of felvene against all advice that i should stop it as its too strong. Pls dont tell me to go to the hospital, the only option is going to a private hospital and i will come back with a national bill for ordinary menstrual pain, am sure they'll want to admit me sef.
What really causes menstrual cramps anyway? i've heard many things, sugar intake etc but i just want to know and find a lasting solution. Help anyone?!?!
Away from cramps, there's this issue.....
Jos Crisis.
This is some very very saddening news. the jos thing is gradually turning into the infamous Hutsi and Tutsi thing except that we are not completely sure this is religous or ethnic crisis. It amazes me that some group of people will just wake up one day and decide its time to take innocent lives to prove a useless point. what do these demons really want?
It just got me thinking, while we are busy living our lives, taking each day as it comes with its wahala, trying to make money and pay bills etc someone just decides out of nowhere that its time to burn and destroy all u have and then kill you.
I'm trying to imagine how helpless those people could have been while facing an obvious and gruesome death, unprepared.
I'm trying to imagine what kind of demon would possess anyone to kill a pregnant woman and a child by cutting them up. Shooting from afar is equally gruesome, but looking into the eyes of a helpless child and cutting him up, why???
This has really got me sad. I really wish and pray something would be done to stop this madness.
My heart goes out to all those affected by the jos crisis. may God comfort them all.
I can imagine all i've missed, been doing blog rounds. the internet went AWOL on me for about 2 weeks and as usual, i've been extremely busy, sometimes i just hate lawyers..... And nothing new's happening so.....
I've been having serious menstrual cramps since yesterday, the kind that grips u and makes u bowl over with really agonizing pains. Just made me wonder how childbirth is going to be if ordinary menstrual cramps is this bad, the mere thought of childbirth makes me shudder.... na wa.
But really, i want a lasting solution to this cramps thing, it makes my life really miserable, cramps, waist pain, back ache, giant headaches and dysentry. I take 2 capsules of felvene against all advice that i should stop it as its too strong. Pls dont tell me to go to the hospital, the only option is going to a private hospital and i will come back with a national bill for ordinary menstrual pain, am sure they'll want to admit me sef.
What really causes menstrual cramps anyway? i've heard many things, sugar intake etc but i just want to know and find a lasting solution. Help anyone?!?!
Away from cramps, there's this issue.....
Jos Crisis.
This is some very very saddening news. the jos thing is gradually turning into the infamous Hutsi and Tutsi thing except that we are not completely sure this is religous or ethnic crisis. It amazes me that some group of people will just wake up one day and decide its time to take innocent lives to prove a useless point. what do these demons really want?
It just got me thinking, while we are busy living our lives, taking each day as it comes with its wahala, trying to make money and pay bills etc someone just decides out of nowhere that its time to burn and destroy all u have and then kill you.
I'm trying to imagine how helpless those people could have been while facing an obvious and gruesome death, unprepared.
I'm trying to imagine what kind of demon would possess anyone to kill a pregnant woman and a child by cutting them up. Shooting from afar is equally gruesome, but looking into the eyes of a helpless child and cutting him up, why???
This has really got me sad. I really wish and pray something would be done to stop this madness.
My heart goes out to all those affected by the jos crisis. may God comfort them all.
Monday, March 1, 2010
no title
Hi Pipo, hope u r having a better life/day/month?
I thot the month had started on a good note until later in the day yesterday when my boss got into a rage.
My boss is quite nice and friendly but is also one of the most difficult person on earth. she wants things to be done properly and orderly, no problem with that but her definition of properly and orderly changes every frigging day and its just hard to keep up. what was right and proper yesterday is gross and stupid today and u just have to guess whats good for tommorow. and once one person misses it that day, lots of people are in trouble for that day.
so yesterday, miss Clerk refused to carry her files into her office on time and automatically, i was at fault! i was running another errand so i didnt think i had to monitor Miss Clerk to see she saw the case files into her office. and when she gets mad, she rakes and rakes and rakes and says lots of things and u r forced to wonder "ok, what exactly is going on?". I actually cried yesterday cos she made it sound like i dont do ANYTHING just receive salary which is just crazy cos i do work, a lot!
ok, maybe crying is silly but i just hate to look incompetent and lazy cos i am not.
Anyway, i guess its one of the hazards of my job and working with my kind of boss.
Meanwhile, Miss Clerk will hear it from me today, nobody should just add to my already full to the brim schedule of work and take no insults for the wrong they do.
thats that with me and my raging boss.
So am going political today.
The state of our nation is really like a movie, at first it was a comedy of all sorts. Now its fast becoming a horror movie.
I dont hate Yaddy, its not his fault that guy is sick, i really dont wish him dead. But seriously, is anything wrong with him resigning to take care of his health? what is wrong with Turai anyway?! Are they going to hide the true state of this man's health till 2011 or when (which by the way is silly cos we will know wassup eventually one day one day)? What is the big idea anyway? are they so against Jonathan becoming President or........... I am really out of ideas.
What bothers me is the implications of this. This is one way to invite the military back in. These guys think democracy has gone on for long enough anyway so its time to step in again. I dont pray for it to happen but really, this is one good reason for them to steal the show while everyone is still confused.
And why is there so much fuss as to whether Jonny Boy should chose the members of his own cabinet? Of course he should. I am against his transferring Aaondoka to special duties, he should have kicked the guy's arse farther than that, like remove him totally. That guy (AG) messed things up too much. Jonny Boy should have people who are ready to work with him on board, fini!
Just wanted to vent my anger against my boss and the state of the nation since i cant exactly confront the parties involved.
Have a great month guys.
I thot the month had started on a good note until later in the day yesterday when my boss got into a rage.
My boss is quite nice and friendly but is also one of the most difficult person on earth. she wants things to be done properly and orderly, no problem with that but her definition of properly and orderly changes every frigging day and its just hard to keep up. what was right and proper yesterday is gross and stupid today and u just have to guess whats good for tommorow. and once one person misses it that day, lots of people are in trouble for that day.
so yesterday, miss Clerk refused to carry her files into her office on time and automatically, i was at fault! i was running another errand so i didnt think i had to monitor Miss Clerk to see she saw the case files into her office. and when she gets mad, she rakes and rakes and rakes and says lots of things and u r forced to wonder "ok, what exactly is going on?". I actually cried yesterday cos she made it sound like i dont do ANYTHING just receive salary which is just crazy cos i do work, a lot!
ok, maybe crying is silly but i just hate to look incompetent and lazy cos i am not.
Anyway, i guess its one of the hazards of my job and working with my kind of boss.
Meanwhile, Miss Clerk will hear it from me today, nobody should just add to my already full to the brim schedule of work and take no insults for the wrong they do.
thats that with me and my raging boss.
So am going political today.
The state of our nation is really like a movie, at first it was a comedy of all sorts. Now its fast becoming a horror movie.
I dont hate Yaddy, its not his fault that guy is sick, i really dont wish him dead. But seriously, is anything wrong with him resigning to take care of his health? what is wrong with Turai anyway?! Are they going to hide the true state of this man's health till 2011 or when (which by the way is silly cos we will know wassup eventually one day one day)? What is the big idea anyway? are they so against Jonathan becoming President or........... I am really out of ideas.
What bothers me is the implications of this. This is one way to invite the military back in. These guys think democracy has gone on for long enough anyway so its time to step in again. I dont pray for it to happen but really, this is one good reason for them to steal the show while everyone is still confused.
And why is there so much fuss as to whether Jonny Boy should chose the members of his own cabinet? Of course he should. I am against his transferring Aaondoka to special duties, he should have kicked the guy's arse farther than that, like remove him totally. That guy (AG) messed things up too much. Jonny Boy should have people who are ready to work with him on board, fini!
Just wanted to vent my anger against my boss and the state of the nation since i cant exactly confront the parties involved.
Have a great month guys.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Vals, Lag, Witches etc
Hi Pips. Been a while, i have been updating, in my mind tho, pardon me. Its been crazy as usual.
where do i start now? ah ha, Vals day!
Feb. 14th 2010 so far has been the best val day i've had in my 27 yrs of existence, considering the fact of course that its virtually the first "real" val celebration for me, sad init? I told u that in the past my radar always caught no gooders and stupid boys, they either ask me out after vals day or break up/travel/go on military operation etc during this very important period.
i've gotten a few gifts in the past. e.g a guy i totally did not dig got me a Charles Delon necklace, very pretty, unfortunately, nothing came out of it. 2008 MF got me some stupid choc, little key ring teddy and card, i dont know how the choc managed to be tasteless but then, i digress. all that is in the past now, praise Gad!!!
So Bubbly got me a lovely teddy bear, very white and red, i've named it Snowy. U can call me agbaya all u want, i've always wanted a teddy bear that would mean a lot. My dad got me one cute yellow teddy for my 25th. i have no idea why the man did that. But at least, Snowy has a girlfriend now, isnt that just cute.
So it was a simple but lovely day. he had ordered chinese and we ate it picnic style. pitched our "tent" far away from people, in a park we both love. we talked, gisted, gazed into each others eyes, stared at the starts and made plans of how we want our lives to be. and i must have given him a 100 kisses that day. it was simple but for me, very memorable.
and oh, i wore this very hot pink alter top on jeans which led to some things later in the evening. I AINT TELLING!!!! get ur mind outta the gutter, good girls dont tell :)
I hated the following monday cos i remembered all the stupid files i have to work on again and listen to silly lawyers move stupid motions. why didnt they just declare monday public holiday sef? right now they are all written in arabic, i'm trying to decode and translate to english.
was in lag last weekend for a friend's wedding. it was ok, had some fun. hooked up with my friend (she usually is my motivation for going to lag anytime) yours truly looked very very gorgeous i tell u, u know how i like owambe kinda life. this my profession just keeps dulling me plus abuja folks dont throw very correct parties.
everything got me tired and didnt really sleep well cos of the heat, it was terrible. i had the hugest headache and cramps sat evening. it was terrible and scary. was just lucky i got people offering to drive me around most of the time, for that, am really grateful. i was EXTREMELY happy and thankful when i left lag tho, apologies to my lag folks, i thot abuja was hot, lag is just on some different level of hotness!
i broke some rules on my dieting in lag. i had a full plate of jollof and friend rice and fried chicken at the party. had 2 slices of yam on saturday and sunday morning. i felt guilty. but i resisted drinks sha. so my diet continues full time now, no more rubbish.
a few randoms:
was watching africa magic at the salon last sat. it was something about witchcraft and mammy water. our depiction of witches and mammy waters always crack me up:
- they always have weird attires and weird hair styles and make up or marks
- they always laugh (usually three times with pauses in btw) whenever they are happy or angry
- they always sing and dance at their meetings
- everything beneath the oceans in mammy waters place is always beautiful and rosy and has lots of fruits while the other witches meet in dark and ugly places
just wondering o, is it really like this? dont be afraid to answer, i wont think u r a witch. lol.
have a great week y'all!
where do i start now? ah ha, Vals day!
Feb. 14th 2010 so far has been the best val day i've had in my 27 yrs of existence, considering the fact of course that its virtually the first "real" val celebration for me, sad init? I told u that in the past my radar always caught no gooders and stupid boys, they either ask me out after vals day or break up/travel/go on military operation etc during this very important period.
i've gotten a few gifts in the past. e.g a guy i totally did not dig got me a Charles Delon necklace, very pretty, unfortunately, nothing came out of it. 2008 MF got me some stupid choc, little key ring teddy and card, i dont know how the choc managed to be tasteless but then, i digress. all that is in the past now, praise Gad!!!
So Bubbly got me a lovely teddy bear, very white and red, i've named it Snowy. U can call me agbaya all u want, i've always wanted a teddy bear that would mean a lot. My dad got me one cute yellow teddy for my 25th. i have no idea why the man did that. But at least, Snowy has a girlfriend now, isnt that just cute.
So it was a simple but lovely day. he had ordered chinese and we ate it picnic style. pitched our "tent" far away from people, in a park we both love. we talked, gisted, gazed into each others eyes, stared at the starts and made plans of how we want our lives to be. and i must have given him a 100 kisses that day. it was simple but for me, very memorable.
and oh, i wore this very hot pink alter top on jeans which led to some things later in the evening. I AINT TELLING!!!! get ur mind outta the gutter, good girls dont tell :)
I hated the following monday cos i remembered all the stupid files i have to work on again and listen to silly lawyers move stupid motions. why didnt they just declare monday public holiday sef? right now they are all written in arabic, i'm trying to decode and translate to english.
was in lag last weekend for a friend's wedding. it was ok, had some fun. hooked up with my friend (she usually is my motivation for going to lag anytime) yours truly looked very very gorgeous i tell u, u know how i like owambe kinda life. this my profession just keeps dulling me plus abuja folks dont throw very correct parties.
everything got me tired and didnt really sleep well cos of the heat, it was terrible. i had the hugest headache and cramps sat evening. it was terrible and scary. was just lucky i got people offering to drive me around most of the time, for that, am really grateful. i was EXTREMELY happy and thankful when i left lag tho, apologies to my lag folks, i thot abuja was hot, lag is just on some different level of hotness!
i broke some rules on my dieting in lag. i had a full plate of jollof and friend rice and fried chicken at the party. had 2 slices of yam on saturday and sunday morning. i felt guilty. but i resisted drinks sha. so my diet continues full time now, no more rubbish.
a few randoms:
was watching africa magic at the salon last sat. it was something about witchcraft and mammy water. our depiction of witches and mammy waters always crack me up:
- they always have weird attires and weird hair styles and make up or marks
- they always laugh (usually three times with pauses in btw) whenever they are happy or angry
- they always sing and dance at their meetings
- everything beneath the oceans in mammy waters place is always beautiful and rosy and has lots of fruits while the other witches meet in dark and ugly places
just wondering o, is it really like this? dont be afraid to answer, i wont think u r a witch. lol.
have a great week y'all!
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